Zip and Zoom

Can I come up for air? The days and weeks go by in a blur. We are all full of good intentions, but somehow time gets away from us. When I was younger I always heard older folks talk about how as you get older time goes by faster. I know the clock ticks one minute at a time - the same sixty seconds to each. There are only sixty minutes in an hour, twenty four hours in a day, seven days in a week, thirty to thirty one days in a month (February is the exception) and twelve months in a year. You would think it would slow down once the kids are grown and out of the house. I'm still scratching my head about that. Somehow it got busier. How does this phenomenon happen?

When we were children time couldn't go by fast enough. How often did we say or hear, "are we there yet?", "how long until my birthday", or thought, "I can't wait to be sixteen or eighteen." One day we wake up and we are fifty. It seem like time has ticked by at the speed of light. We zip here and zoom there, always in a hurry to fill our time. Something or someone demands our attention and it can't wait. Bosses demand more, family, friends, social groups, sports, church, professional groups, clients all wanting a moment of your time. Plus the countless other activities to fritter away the day.

I think about all the things I wish I had done differently or sooner. Or just something I had plan to do, but the day came and went. I didn't have time to fit it in. It's not so much about regret as it is trying to figure out how to slow it down and capture each moment without missing anything of importance to me.

What I am trying to learn is how to manage my time and not let it manage me. Reducing time stealers is key. How many hours are wasted in front of a TV or other activities to please those around us rather than what is truly important to the life we want to live. While it is important to engage with others and value time with them, we must be learn of the art of saying, "NO", not just to others, but to ourselves. For many this is a difficult word. Somehow this word denotes selfishness. Guilt is piled on because you've denied someone else what they are asking. Fear of loss, if we do say no, is the strongest motivator for the one who usually answers "yes." The problem is it's unrealistic to say yes to everything. If you do, you live your life in a frenzy.

"No" is not a cruel word. It's an honest word. It's not a word that rejects the person, but rather sets the expectation of what we are willing or capable of doing. It is a way to be kind to ourselves so we don't overload and burn out. It is kind to others because it does not give them a false expectation or sense of entitlement. It also allows you to give your very best to the things you say yes to. I used the word "art" of saying "no", because we must learn to say it with our kind intentions. We must convey a spirit of wanting the best for ourselves and the best for others.

When we are raising children we must balance between our yes and no. If we always say yes we are creating a self indulgent future adult who always wants their way. If we always say no we are creating an angry person who will always want their way. Neither is good for the child or society as they grow older.

I have come to understand that if I want to slow things down and enjoy a more meaningful life, it's okay to say "NO." I am a better person to myself and others when I am doing things that God designed me to do. Our talents are a great indicator of what we should be spending our time on. Develop them and share them with others. Everyone benefits.